【HP/FB 双语】GGAD通信集——三十五只猫头鹰(10)

You ed me, Dumbledore. You ed me and formed me and let me loose in the world. And I think your little brother would agree that you have a habit of ignoring ufortable truths.

你成就了我，邓布利多。你成就了我，塑造了我，又让我被世界遗忘。我想你那个弟弟会认同这个想法——你总习惯于忽视令人难以接受的真相。

But enough about you. Let's talk about me, your haunted and broken pet Dark Lord, your misbegotten experiment, who used to spin sweet spells round your body and smile as you begged him to bugger you And who, I wonder, knows that Is that one of those things you must ever hide Poor Albus.

谈论你的事已经足够多了，现在来说说我吧，您那忧愁缠身又被伤透了心的宠物黑魔王，您的非法试验品。是谁过去常让甜蜜的念咒声缠上你的身体，又是谁在你求他干你的时候忍俊不禁？还有谁会知道这些，还有谁？这是又一件你必须藏匿起来的事，对吗？可怜的阿不思。

Yes, we go around in circles. Here I am back to mocking you until I can barely breathe for anger.

没错，我们就是在这么兜圈子。我又开始反过来嘲弄你了，直到怒火使我无法呼吸。

I have a new pen pal, Professor Dumbledore, aren't you proud Never think that you're the only one I write to—god knows if you were, I would've bashed my head out on the wall years ago. And it's lovely, sometimes, to talk to somebody who doesn't disapprove of everything one is, a fellow Dark wizard, ambitious with abandon. British boy, very clever, a little stiff, silly made-up name—owled me out of the blue a few years ago looking to talk shop, as you'd say. Great mind, but no sense of humor. He seemed rather startled when I mentioned that I knew you.

我又有了一个新笔友，邓布利多教授，你不高兴吗？千万别觉得你是唯一与我通信的人——天知道如果真是这样，我应该早在几年前就去撞墙了。其实有时候，和一个与自己完全不同的人聊聊还挺愉快的——又一个野心勃勃的黑巫师。一个英国男孩，他非常聪明，但有些倔强，用着一个有点蠢的假名——他几年前突然写信给我，字字不离我的老本行，就像你说的，老本行。他脑子不错，但缺乏幽默感。在我提到我认识你的时候，他似乎过分惊讶了。

I told him that you were a user and a hypocrite, and to stay well away from you. Of course, he was already frightened of you. You might want to keep an eye out for him though. He could be a dangerous lad. And how could you possibly handle a Dark Lord who isn't your lapdog

我告诉他你是一个利用者，一个伪君子，让他离你远点。当然，他已经很害怕你了。也许你想盯着点他，这家伙可能会变得很危险。但你又要怎么去控制一个黑魔王？它又不像我一样是你的小宠物。

Be well uncertain of your decency, Albus Dumbledore. And Gertrude is a crazy bitch.

享受你那脆弱的体面吧，阿不思·邓布利多。另外，那个格特鲁德就是个发疯的婊子。

注：

1.glacial 缓慢的，冰封的  释义常用作“缓慢的”，but为什么好多通信集的翻译都给的是第二个（孩怕）。我把My whole life has be glacial这一句和青苔联系在一起了，不然感觉说这个好没来由。

2.这个“墙上”和“斑点”这些词语很容易就会让我联想到伍尔夫的另一部小说《墙上的斑点》，写的大概是一个人发散的思维，意识流派。文中的女主人公盯着墙上的那个斑点（蜗牛）感觉就很像是GG盯着墙上的这些青苔，如果两者真的有联系，感觉作者太太可能还比较认可伍尔夫，或者想说她的影响力很大。邓教寄《海浪》的时间节点是伍尔夫去世十年之后，她在世时就已经是很有名气的作者了。

3.哈哈哈哈哈哈哈GG被格特鲁德的语法折磨到了。当时就是想知道GG认为AD在给他灌输什么才萌生了要去看《每个人的自传》的想法，但是很遗憾这本书在中国没有被正式翻译过，我顶多只能了解到格特鲁德写的这个好像是关于自恋什么的。费劲一番周折好不容易找到了原文，要是你们想要可以去某伏特私我，同名，晋江不好发私信。

第十二只猫头鹰

August 2nd, 1956

Gellert,

盖勒特，

One of the perils of teaching for long is that one bes ustomed to presenting, as one must to children, the illusion that one is entirely knowledgeable and confident in one's path through life, even when one may, in fact, be a fool and lost.

长期教学的一个坏处就是让一个人习惯于在孩子面前，塑造出他在人生路上拥有绝对的博学与自信的假象。也许实际上，他只是个失败的老傻瓜。

I never considered you my lapdog, old friend. If anything, I often thought of myself as yours for those few months, I caught up in your dreams of glory, I the one who felt betrayed when I realized the full implications of those dreams and the broken backs they would climb upon. But when teaching long, too, one learns to recognize when a dispute is simply—did not—did too.

我从没有把你当做是宠物，老朋友。如果有的话，我时常觉得在那几个月里，我对你而言才是如此。我当时迷上你引以为傲的梦想，但在意识到所有这些梦想背后的东西和实现它所要完成的一切时，我才是感受到背叛的那个。经历了长期的教学生涯，我也开始意识到引起争论的原因很简单——就像是小孩子吵架一样。

Hate me, then, if it will make your remaining years easier. I had hoped, childish hopes, that you wouldn't, even after—but I am nothing but a lost old fool anyway. But, whatever you think of me, I must ask after this British fellow you mentioned. This made-up name wouldn't happen to be Voldemort, would it I would leave you well enough alone, as you wish, but there have been ominous rumors round that name as of late, and I ampelled to ask.